The black community and mental illness

                                                                 

I am a black female who knows that talking about mental illness in the African American community can make you get some backlash, or even look at like you really are, “crazy.” I have been open about my anxiety disorder with some of my family members. I am the fortunate enough to have a family member that shares the same disorder, and they are truly understanding. There are of course those around me who do not understand what it means to have an anxiety disorder. I have had discussions with family members who told me that my anxiety was all in my head. They would say things like, “you just need to pray it away”, or “it’s all in your head.” This made me feel sad, angry, and uncomfortable.

I think that people who denied your mental illness is someone who has no respect for you. I feel this way because they are ignorant to what is going on, and they miss the biggest point; they could deal with the same thing. When I hear things like this I think about how many hospital visits that I have not knowing if I had a heart condition, or if it was just stress, or how many times I have thought about hurting myself, so I wouldn’t have to deal with all the stress that comes with anxiety. It breaks my heart that they feel that all I need is religion, and some yoga to help me get rid of a mental illness.

I once remembered someone saying that, “the brain is just like any other organ, if you don’t take care of it things will not work properly.” I thought this was quite a brilliant way to explain how mental illnesses work. My generation is known to talk about mental illness. I have siblings that are very open about feeling depress and having anxiety. It’s honestly becoming a bit better in our community to talk about mental illnesses in every form. If you have any questions or comments please feel free to leave a comment (good or bad), story, etc. This is a safe space we are here to heal together.

Be Brave!

  

It’s not always easy to talk to people, let alone the world about having a mental disorder. I have been called crazy, and other nasty names by people who used my mental disorder against me. I have dated people who could not understand why I act out in such ways. My adopted mother, never understood why I had such a hard time standing in front of a crowd.

  One night, I just decided to get on Facebook, and share with the world what I was going through. I got messages telling me that what I was doing was so brave. I was able to connect with others who admitted to me that they to dealt with a mental disorder. I was so happy to know that there were other who also dealt with the same thing. This helps take some of the pain out my life. I have an interesting support system. I was able to connect with a young woman who had bi-polar disorder, and whenever I have any problems I was able to connect with her. It made me happy that I had someone that I could understand what it is like to walk around with a mental disorder.

There are times that I get called, “crazy”, and people try to shame for being open and honest. But I believe that if you can live in your truth there is no one who can call you out about something that you have already admitted to. And at times it hurts when people use my mental disorder to define me. But I put those emotions aside and look for ways that I can approve myself. In other words, I disregard the hate that I get when it comes to someone shaming me. What they fail to realize is that they can end up in a depression or develop some type of mental disorder. And I have had experiences where people who shamed me called me and apologize about how they treated me. I understood, and I forgave them.’ Leave any comments (good or bad), and experiences. Remember that this is a safe space for us to heal together!

Abuse

 

                               

Writing this blog is very hard but I think that it is something that needs to be talked about. I have this negative outlook on people. It is normal to not trust people, but I often wonder what their thoughts about me is going to be, and in my mind without a second thought it is usually something negative. I don’t mean to be like this, but this is just the way things are. I know one factor that played a big role in my mental illness is the mental, and physical abuse that I endure at the hand of my family member. I was a very quiet child, and as I became older that stood out to people, and unfortunately that made me a target. Not only was I a target in school, but I was also a target in my own home. I was supposed to be protected and loved. Enduring this abuse not only affected my self-esteem it made my anxiety unmanageable.

I wish that I could have spoken to someone that I trusted so I could have had a better childhood. Every child deserves to grow up in a safe environment. No matter what people say, you need to remember that taking care of yourself first is the most important thing for you to do.  If anyone has a story to tell don’t hesitate to share. Rather if you agree with this blog, or you don't this is a safe place for us to heal together.